Krampus 3D Render, Digital Artwork by DarkAngelLost

! REPORT

Krampus

3D Render by DarkAngelLost

Last night, Krampus was spotted wandering the North Pole but a surveillance camera from an international weather station. Krampus has spent the past 50 years in Santa Claus’ dungeon below his toyshop, but it appears that he has escaped. He is believed to be heading towards civilization, looking to return to his role as punisher. It’s been reported that he was muttering the names of several politicians and world leaders as he was fleeing Santa’s estate.

Krampus and St. Nicolas used to be longtime partners with the toymaker leaving gifts for children, and the demon punishing the naughty ones. The two had a very public falling out in a German pub around 175 years ago when St. Nick accused Krampus of getting too extreme with his punishments. Outraged, the son of Hel flipped over the table screaming, “my methods have not changed! You’ve just become soft, like your belly,” before storming out, leaving Nicolas to pay for their drinks and the damages. He then seemed to disappear for the next 125 years.

The horned demon resurfaced a little over 50 years ago and went on a massive punishment spree. Authorities, fearing Krampus’ wrath, felt helpless to stop him as he beat, ate, or dragged to hell all those he thought to be deserving. The UN eventually contacted St. Nicolas and asked him to rein in his former partner. It was then that Santa arrested and imprisoned Krampus indefinitely. It’s unknown why Krampus has chosen now to speculate, but many experts are speculating that recent world events have reawakened the demon’s innate need to punish.